Jealousy and comparison

Good evening beauties! How is everyone doing? I am doing fabulously well and I hope you are as well, it has been a long but productive week and I’m very thankful to God for that.

Today I wanted to talk to you ladies about the downsides of jealousy and comparison.

Now… this is a very sensitive topic because one thing I have noticed with us ladies is that we don’t like to admit that we sometimes compare ourselves to other women (knowingly or unknowingly) and in order for us to put an end to this behaviour of ours we must accept that we do these things...very often.

 I recently received a phone call from a friend asking me to check out our friend’s Instagram picture of her engagement ring. As much as we were so happy and enthusiastic for her, the topic of our phone conversation quickly turned into ourselves and our lives and how much we wanted to have what she had just received. We then went on to talk about baes and bae issues... you know, your usual girl talk.

Although our chat was just your average convo, I thought about it and it made me wonder why we ladies are so eager and always so in a rush to have it all.  Looking back at my life, personally, I have always wanted to have it all right there and then. I recall wanting so many things my older sister, friends and cousin had. I even remember wanting my period to come as soon as my friends started having theirs (and now we all know that having them isn’t that fun after all).  

Ladies, can we all just take a second to count our blessings and pray and work towards the things we want? Can we also just wait and pray that what is meant for us will come at God’s due time and not at ours or our friend’s due time? And at last, can we just be happy for other ladies without thinking about ourselves and when our turn is going to be?

Whenever I scroll down my social media pages all I see these days is ‘goals this, goals that’ not realising that we don’t even know what goes on in people’s lives yet we are just claiming their lives for ourselves and it really shouldn’t be that way, and even if other people’s lives were perfect seeing others happy should only make us happy and keep us motivated, not sad, jealous, not miserable and not angry.

Some of us are so envious, envious to the point that we even wish downfall on other people just so that we can feel better about ourselves, if this is the case for you then please keep reading.

There are a two points I am going to make in regards to this and I want you to be extremely attentive.

Point number one:

The most important point I am going to make is that in order for you to progress, you must learn to focus on your own life. Do what makes you happy and keep working on the things that are going to make your dreams come alive.  Watching your friend’s  or your family’s progress is not going to bring you closer to your dreams or wherever you want to be and it should only inspire you to not give up on your dreams if anything.  Stop wasting your time, the precious time given to you that you could be using to invest in bettering yourself and your life. Ever heard of the quote comparison is the theft of joy?

Point number two: People will only show you what they want you to see.  Do you think that people want to show you their darkest times? Do you share your darkest times on social media?

You must guard your heart and your feelings. If other people’s progression is making you feel some type of way then you should really check yourself and ask yourself the following questions: Why do I feel this way? Is there something in my life that I am really unhappy about that is making me jealous of others?  What is stopping me from improving myself and becoming the person that I want to be and how do I make a positive change?  And at last, is there any way I can make my life better so that I can stop feeling this way towards others and celebrate their success instead of being jealous?

Once you sit down and honestly answer these questions you will hopefully get to the root of the issue and find a solution to the problem.

Work towards the life you want to have and whilst you do so count your blessings and thank God for all you have because they are certainly things that some people may be wishing for!!

Today’s moral of the story

1. We create our own heartbreaks by expecting things to happen in our own time. You can only try your best in life and what is meant to happen to us will happen in due time

2.  Comparison is the theft of joy. Don’t let anyone or anything steal your joy

3. Focus on bettering yourself and striving for the life you want to live, don’t waste your time watching other people’s move.